Life in the Time of Cholera…or Birthday-related First World Problems

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Today is my birthday.  My brother-in-law wished me a happy birthday earlier today and just sent me a message on Facebook.  It reads, “How’s your day going?”

Here is my reply:

1) I am 33. Jesus was dead by 33. What the hell have I done in my 33 years?!

2) I am not even 33. My true birthday is tomorrow. 33 years ago I was one day away from being born.

3) I just found out James arranged for a special bagel delivery for me (Canadian deli just opened in Auckland). There was lox and cream cheese in the fridge. The problem: the bagels never arrived!

4) I wanted sushi for lunch but sushi here is nasty. It’s all cooked garbage on top of unseasoned rice. So I settled for Thai. I took Leah, who was pantless of course, to pick up some Thai for us to all share back home. The Thai place was closed! I went to a Chinese buffet in town. It looked gross and everything was mislabeled. It was so bad we threw out most of it. 
 
5) It’s muggy and my toe is hurting, I think from arthritis.
 
6) I found a white eyebrow hair the other day.
 

7) 95% of my Facebook friends are in a different time zone and have yet to wish me a happy birthday.

8) The 5% of my Facebook friends who ARE in my time-zone and are acknowledging my birthday are acknowledging a fake birthday – as I am technically 32 and 364 days old.

9) The Chinese food will probably give me an MSG headache.

10) Like a fool, I bought regular strength painkillers. Why on earth wouldn’t I buy the “extra strength” version?!

11) It looks like it’s about to rain.

12) There hasn’t been a new Rob Ford video in days.

13) There isn’t any chocolate in the house.

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5 thoughts on “Life in the Time of Cholera…or Birthday-related First World Problems

  1. Vita

    Sounds like you need a stiff drink or to go somewhere and hibernate. Happy birthday whenever you want to receive the wishes! All the best, Vita

    Reply
  2. celestedimilla

    Haha! Just wait till your 44!! It get’s better after 44, however. I just turned 47 and it was the best, most relaxing birthday I’ve had in a long time. Anyway, a very happy birthday to you! Your day may not have been good, but I bet your year will be fantastic!! Celeste :)

    Reply
  3. Eric Troniak

    Miriam,
    Cheer up. Happy 30th Birthday. Hope you have a special day with James and the kids.

    It is 10AM in Winnipeg Manitoba (Canada) and we are in the midst of what I would call a mini blizzard after Environment Canada predicted a light dusting of 2 to 4 centimeters of snow today. It took me one hour to drive to work when it normally takes no more than 20 minutes. I am sure you are not missing our weather. Your weather is sounding pretty good right now.

    Eric Troniak

    Reply

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